Hey readers,guess what? I'm gonna
cut my hair short.
Don't be shock to see me with shock hair.
Why cut short?
Cause I'm sick and tired of long hair.
To Belle:
No matter what you say, I'm still gonna cut my hair.
To Fatynn:
Sorry we can't exchange our hair.
I knw how much you dislike your hair now.
But you just have to wait for 1 more year
For you to have your long hair back.
Its 12 Sept and currently the time is around 6:15 am when I type all this in my hp.
Thought of blogging early in the morning but then the laptop is in brother room and I don't want to disturb him sleeping.
Lately I keep having strange feelings towards the life im in right now.
With family seem to be in havoc most of the times to friends whom taking my spot or the place in life and acting like nothing happen.
To them I may not realize any changes.But indeed I do realize the changes.
At home I was the outcast, with friends I'm just the one that is full of mistakes.
Is it me or you that matters most?
In this life, I thought that I was the playmaker of my life. But then it seem like I'm not the one who is the playmaker of my life.
I just don't understand this life anymore.
I only got one life and I want to make it work. But then people around at times just don't want to see me to make it work.
I want to lead my life my way. I want to be the playmaker of my life and not you. I want our dance prac to be like b4. I want to be there with M.G.B.I instead of you being with my mates.
Everything change when you appear and it seem like I was seen gone in M.G.B.I.
Its a matter of me or you right now, right here at this moment.
You seem to be so selfish towards me and my life.
Can you get out of my way?
Just came back from dance prac..And i got 2 bruises.1 on my arm and the other on my knee.Great isn't it?On the arm, get it when Zali was breaking and hit or shall I say kick my arm accidentally.On the knee get it when i was stnading up and it hits the table.It was a great impact okay.Before getting the one on the knee,I alr had one which still recovering.But then get another one.
Like WTH & WTF!
And when I reach home,
Mom told me that we are goin to JB this sat.
WTH!
I was planing to go for the chingay registration thing..
Damn!
Now everything have to be re-plan!
Labels: Can we don't go JB on Sat?
Yesterday was a havoc at home.
Its all started of with little sister.
And I get the scolding more then her.
The blame was put on me
When i wasn't the one
Who is at fault.
I get the hurt.
I get the tears.
I get the pain.
I get the bruises.
But not her.
All she gets is just a nag
from mom and not more.It is so not fair isn't it?
Trying to say she younger among all?
That can't be.
They way she reacted towards me all these years
Show me how much she actually
Prefer, love, care & concern them more.
She's like making me the outcast among all.
I just don't understand her
And so did she.
She seem not to bother how
Hurt and pain i was in.
To her it feels just right huh?
I just need a comfort from someone right now!
Daddy come back.
I want you back.
Why did you have to go.
It's just not the same without you.
It makes me sad every time i see those photos of yours.
Mommy's always nag.
She's always yelling too.
She makes me cry a lot but not as much as you.
I'm always thinking about you.
Your always making me teary-eyed.
I love you daddy why did you have to go.
I miss you a lot but you obviously don't know.
Otherwise you wouldn't have had to go.
God makes me mad because he took you away.
It's hard not to cry but i go anyway.
Sometimes when I'm all alone and i have time to think.
I think about you and i cry and cry and cry.
Some people think "oh you should be over this"
But then i think to myself you don't know how it feels to be in this pain
or to how hard it is to make it go away.
Friends & teachers try to help me but it doesn't help at all.
My head hurts all the time, especially when I'm about to cry.
Its hard to type down these words as tears blur up my eyes.
When i try to speak about you and then i start to cry
I miss you daddy why did you have to go.
Please came back.
Life is not the same without you around.
Labels: Hurting for me but not you.